Terminology Poll

[greenchestnuts]

Hi everyone,

After a lot of discussion in the Tumblr asexual communities, I've created a poll trying to get some feedback on preferences for a term for people who aren't asexual, demisexual, or grey-asexual. The link to the poll, and a brief explanation of why it is necessary, is here at my Tumblr. Even though this project came out of things on one particular social media site, I'm hoping to get a wide cross-section of responses from across the Internet, so I'm sharing it here.

Thanks!

Comments

[greenchestnuts]

I think there's a big difference between the problems with "asexual" and with "sexual." Asexual basically has two meanings, and only one of them applies to people. If you describe someone as asexual, a few people will make budding jokes, but that's because they've never heard of the other meaning, and that's something we're fixing with awareness and education. However, if you describe someone as sexual, what does that mean? That they have sex? That they experience sexual arousal? That they enjoy sex? That they experience sexual attraction? Three of those definitions can apply to aces. If we're going to have a word to define everyone who's not us, as I believe we should to facilitate discussion, that word should be something that can't be used to describe us.

When I say that people use "sexual" as a weapon, I don't mean the way we're applying it, but the word in general. For example, as a resident of the US, I can't think of any racial groups of color that don't have an associated stereotype about their sexuality. Often it's about hypersexuality, and these ideas bias jury trials, influence how teachers interact with their kids, etc. Or, for another example, the stereotype that gay men are sexual to the point of being hypersexual is used to portray them as predators and whip up homophobia. Not everyone gets to express their sexuality in a way free of repercussions or social fetters; in fact, most people don't. Many people are punished or hurt for being sexual or perceived as sexual, in any sense of the word.

The concept of "sexual" is so fraught, troubled and nuanced, and it means so much besides the meaning we're trying to establish here.